I used to have post-partum depression…
I didn’t plan to be a stay-at-home mama. I was actually on my way to nursing school and had my whole life planned out, or so I thought. I knew I was pregnant and about to be a mom but I had no idea what that really entailed. I saw most moms move on after birth. I thought it was normal. I didn’t expect to have post-partum depression.
I mean, the thought of becoming a mom was both scary and exciting but I never expected it to be lonely, sad and anxious. It was a battle within the chambers of my heart. I was torn. I didn’t have motivation to move on. It was winter and so cold that some days I couldn’t focus on anything besides surviving. They were my darkest days. I also thought that it would just magically go away on its own. So I waited and waited and waited some more. Until one day it hit me. I couldn’t function! Normal little things were the biggest deal and would send me into a spiral of drowning thoughts. I knew I needed help to climb out of this chasm.
I had a sweet friend named Jess that threw a rope for me to climb. I am Mexican and in Mexican culture mental health is like voodoo. You don’t talk about going to a therapist. You would be considered crazy! Depression isn’t seen as a real problem and to fix it you just need to get out of your head and work harder. So you can see how my resistance against going to therapy was embedded in my brain. Either way Jess, also a Mexican-American, was most understanding and helped break the stigma of our culture for me.
In the midst of this low point in my life, my husband got me a ring for our anniversary. It was an electroformed Rose Gold ring with our family’s birthstones on it. The rocks were rough and raw. I fell in love with it. I loved the meaning of it. I was intrigued by how such a beautiful thing could be if it wasn’t a clean-cut diamond or something refined. I realized that’s how my husband saw me. I felt anything but beautiful at that time. Post-delivery body and the months after really tore up my self-esteem. I mean, besides your body being out of proportion, sometimes it doesn’t even work! It’s horrible! Go give the next mom you see a hug! These mamas are tough cookies! Back to what I was saying. So I felt un-beautiful. Yet this thought of something not being “refined” and still being beautiful kept me going. At that moment I never thought I would want to start this company. The thoughts later came as I learned more about the process of making these beautiful rings. And with the help of many people who encouraged me and reminded me that I can do hard things like start a small business, here I am sending out my message.
The process is long and sometimes tedious. I have to be so so patient for these rings to become what you see in the pictures but it is so so worth it! I hope when you purchase my jewelry you can always remember that it’s ok to feel broken and lost sometimes, but never lose sight of your worth, even when you don’t feel complete, even when you feel unrefined. You are beautiful, my friend, and just because you don’t see it sometimes, that is what people who truly love you see in you.
About the creator…
My Name is Natalia Garcia Robbins. I am a stay-at-home mother for my sweet baby girl. I live here in Salt Lake City, Utah. I have been living here for practically my whole life but was born in Aguascalientes, Mexico. We migrated when I was very young. Although, I have deep roots from my home in Mexico, being Mexican-American is who I am. I enjoy eating tacos, sushi, and pizza. I am always hungry for these foods! I used to be a dancer-not so much anymore since my husband has two left feet-but I still enjoy the art of it. I enjoy watercolor painting and I love love love to create jewelry.